


Old Wounds

by LadySkywalker77



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars - The Rise of Skywalker, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2020-02-15
Packaged: 2021-01-15 14:56:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21255197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySkywalker77/pseuds/LadySkywalker77
Summary: Rey and Ben have come together.The Emperor and the First Order have been defeated.The war is won.But some wounds have yet to heal.





	1. Chapter 1

_Rey and Ben have come together. The Emperor and the First Order have been defeated. The war is won. _

_But some wounds have yet to heal._

_***_

She felt it as soon as she went into the room. His guilt.

He was thinking about Han again. About how he’d killed his father for nothing, and he’d have to live with that for the rest of his days. About how he should let guilt consume him. About how much he didn’t deserve the life he had now.

He was sitting on the opposite side of the bed that they now shared, facing away from her. He was trying to shut her out. He didn’t want her to feel his pain.

She walked around the bed and stood in front of him. He didn’t look up at her. He was trying to control his breathing, trying to center himself before facing her.

She put her hand on his head and kneeled down to meet his gaze. His eyes were on the verge of tears, but he said nothing. She began running her fingers through his hair. A gesture they’d both grown used to.

She knew better than to ask him if he was okay. She knew he wasn’t.

“Hey,” she said instead. “Don’t do that. Don’t punish yourself like that.”

He stared at her for a moment, examining the features of her face. She was so beautiful. He often wondered what it was that she saw in him.

“Rey...” he began. But before he could continue, she grabbed his hand and gently she placed it on her cheek. Immediately, he felt her mind open up to him.

Of course, they were always connected. They could sense each other’s feelings and each other’s pain. And sometimes fleeting thoughts would travel between them. But this was different. She was trying to show him something.

She leaned forward to press her forehead against his own. “I want you to see yourself the way I see you,” she whispered.

He could never deny her anything. All he could do was close his eyes and let her in.

Her mind flooded into his own. And then there it was. He could see and feel all the goodness and courage she saw in him. _You made mistakes, Ben. Just like everyone else. But they don’t define you._

After a moment, he opened his eyes and let out the breath he had been holding. He saw her eyes opening too. He was still cupping her face. Her hands had moved to rest against his shoulders. She moved them slowly as she tangled her fingers on the back of his neck.

“I love you,” he whispered. “More than anything.” And she smiled. That beautiful radiant smile of hers that could outshine any star. And he knew he wanted to see it every day for the rest of his life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought it might be fun to add a little fluffy something to this fic for #ReyloLove!
> 
> Have a happy Valentines Day!

It was never easy for either of them whenever they had to part ways. But sometimes she had to go where he couldn’t follow. Sometimes she had to go places where he wasn’t and would never be welcome. Because of who he used to be.

He couldn’t blame them for that.

It’s not that he was alone. He hadn’t felt alone since the day they’d decided to be together. Their bond only seemed to grow stronger since then. He could always feel her light shining around him. 

But nothing compared to the feeling of really having her in his arms. Nothing compared to the feeling of knowing she’d be there when he drifted off to sleep, and knowing she’d still be there when he woke up.

That was the feeling he had been craving for the past month.

He stood overlooking the hangar as he watched the Falcon emerge from hyperspace. Of course, it was too far away for him to actually see that it was his father’s old ship, but he knew it was. He could sense it.

His eyes remained locked on it as it descended and finally made a flawless landing on the dock just below. He still marveled at how well she could handle that old freighter, especially considering it was probably more spare parts than originals by now.

He walked down the stairs to the dock just as the bay door opened and Chewbacca walked out. He greeted Ben with a soft roar as he ruffled the man’s hair. It was funny, really. Ben knew he wasn’t small by any means, but that old Wookie still made him feel like a child. He couldn’t help but smile at the gesture.

He patted Chewie’s back as the Wookie walked past him toward the stairs that led back to the hangar, no doubt looking for food.

When Rey didn’t immediately follow her co-pilot out of the ship, he decided to walk in and look for her instead. He needed to see her.

He headed straight to the cockpit, where he knew she would be. She was sitting in the pilot’s seat, looking away from him, and he could tell her mind was off in some distant place.

“Rey?” he whispered, not wanting to startle her. She turned at the sound of his voice, and whatever place her mind had gone off too was forgotten when she jumped out of her seat and straight into his arms. God. It felt so right to have her there.

They stood there with their arms wrapped around each other for some time. She made no move to let him go, and he’d be damned if he was going to be the one to pull away.

A minute passed and she slowly lifted her head to face him. She had an expression on her face that he couldn’t read.

“What is it?” he whispered, placing his hand on her cheek as he stroked it with his thumb.

“Ben...” she began. And then she looked away, as if searching for the right words. “I... there’s something I need to tell you.” 

Her voice was so gentle, but there was a fear in it that he didn’t think he’d ever heard before. She took his hand then, the one that was on her cheek, and pulled it down to hold it between their chests. She gave it a little squeeze, which, given the tone of her voice, did little to ease the worry that was now building in his chest. He could only stand there and watch as Rey took a deep breath and carefully placed his hand on her stomach.

Almost immediately, he felt a stir in the Force. A little twinkle of light that didn’t belong to her.

When he looked up at her face again, her eyes were bright with tears.

“Rey?” he asked. He couldn’t even finish the question, but he didn’t have to. She nodded.

He stood there looking at her, unable to move, or even breathe, for about twenty seconds. (Which, to Rey, were the longest twenty seconds of all time).

Then, before she even realized he was moving, he was hugging her and lifting her off the ground without so much as an effort. She squealed in surprise, and fuck, if that wasn’t the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard then he didn’t know what was.

Then, just because he wanted to, he spun them around once, then again, just for good measure. And she giggled.

Wait. Never mind. That was the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard. But didn’t he always think that when she laughed?

When he finally set her down, he took her face between his hands. And then he was kissing her. It was slow and soft. He wanted to live in this moment forever, because never in a thousand years did he ever think he’d be this happy. Because a part of him still didn’t believe he deserved any of this, that he deserved her, let alone that little twinkle of light now growing inside her.

When he finally put her down, he realized they were both crying. But their tears, both his and hers, were happy.

But then her smile faded, and he immediately found himself wishing he could make her laugh again.

“Ben...” she said as she looked down at her feet. “I have no idea how to be a mother.”

Somewhere the back of his mind he could sense the fear and doubt that she was feeling at that moment. And he hated that he didn’t immediately know how to stop it. What do you do when the bravest, strongest person you know is scared?

All he could do was tell her the truth.

“You’re going to be a wonderful mother, Rey.”

“How could you know that, though?”

“Because I know you,” he said. “Because you care. Because I know that you’ll be there when this kid needs you and you will love her no matter what.”

Rey’s eyes snapped back up to his then. She was about to open her mouth to say something but he needed to finish making his point because Rey was nothing if not stubborn and he wasn’t going to let her protest just yet.

“You are the best person I know, Rey. If this kid takes after you then she will be perfect,” he said as he took her hand again, just because he could. “And if for some twisted reason she takes after me, then… Well, you already know how to handle my moods.”

Rey snorted at that and then she was smiling again. And then he smiled too because he’s stupidly in love with her. But what else is new?

“You think it’s a girl?” she asked.

And then Ben’s brain short-circuited for the second time that day.

“What?”

“You just called our baby _her _and _she_.”

_Our baby_. He loved the sound of that. But that was beside the point.

“I guess I did.”

“Why?”

“It’s just...” he struggled to find the right words. “It’s just a feeling.”

“A wishful thinking sort of feeling or a weird Force mojo kind of feeling?”

Now it was he the one who snorted.

“I think it’s the latter.” But just to be sure, he placed his hand on her belly again and reached out to their little twinkle of light again.

“Yeah,” he said through a smile. “It’s a girl.”

“How come you can tell but I can’t?”

“That’s because I’m way more powerful in the Force than you are.”

That earned him a hard punch in the gut. But it was worth it.

“Ow.”

“You wish, hotshot.”

It took every ounce of will power in his body not to throw her over his shoulder just then. He probably shouldn’t do that anytime soon.

Instead, he just kissed her.

When they parted, both a little out of breath, she smiled at him again.

“I love you,” she said.

And he smiled too. He would never get tired of hearing her say those words.

He rested his forehead against hers.

“I love you too. Until the end of time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes Rey needs a hug too guys. 
> 
> I wanted Ben to a little more confident this time around... he is a Solo after all. Plus, he'd make a great dad. *cries*
> 
> Anyway... I hope y'all appreciate the little bit of Hanleia vibes I tried to sneak in there. 
> 
> Also, I didn't add the pregnancy tag because I wanted it to be a surprise. #SorryNotSorry

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This is the first fic I've ever posted so I appreciate feedback. Also, thank you to my beautiful Clowns (gc) for your encouragement. 
> 
> Follow me on Twitter at @LadySolo77 for non-stop Reylo and Bendemption nonsense.


End file.
